.adoi...hati dah kosong,ditambah pulak perot yg kosong..

dah lama tak update blog...mcm2 aku nak crita..(cecite cecite)..alone giler skrg ni..sape nak teman??...boleh jadi pendengar setia tak?...aku nak luahkan mcm2 perasaan yg berkabung dalam hati aku ni..ish...'u can never forget ur first krush'..kalau korang pi KFC,ada stu banting yg tulis ayat serupa gitu..ada maksud tu..adoi...hati dah kosong,ditambah pulak perot yg kosong,,then,i fill it with char koey teow(favorite food)..but still,my heart is empty..anybody want to fill the blank?..
am i too desperate?...i saved the blank for her..if she come,then the blank is hers..but if she dont..the blank is still hers..however,if the blank is filled with someone else,i cant put another blank to put her in..i have to forget about her..but she need 'bimbingan',like i always does(i always advice her,remind her something,about good thing la..)..she want me(lead her)..but she is someone else..i cant go to her..im stuck!
then,what should i do?..i am confused..i'm glad that she is still  my friend,but still,i love her...i cant lie to myself..i cant lie to her either..so,whether i keep messaging her or i stop texting her..am i a betrayer?..
*to everyone,dont think that i am a good people,nor a bad people...judge it through my condition..
first,yes..i still love her..second,i cant love her coz she is someone else..
do history need to be repeated?
owh,my english is so bad..damn it!..hate myself..why do i have to be like this...
terhuyung hayang..terkontang kanting..where am i?
lalalalalalalaa...i need 'home  therapy'..
*message mode:
"salam,mak buat apa tu?..dah sihat ke demam aritu?"
"salam..tak buat apa pon..sihat dah sikit..apit buat apa?...sat lagi adik nak ckp dgn apit,dari kelmarin dia nak ckp..."
oh god..i miss my family damn much...
..but my mom bless her..
i hope there is fairy that can replace her..
i am the guy that are afraid to try..shit!..coward!!!
but i dont want to destroy our relationship...
i know she comfort now..i like to see her comfort..i let her be..as long as she happy..i am happy..to love is nothing,to be loved is something,to love and be loved is everything...saranghae..sarang hae always...till i die..sarangahe:(